Snake in the...!

After hurriedly filling the duck pool this morning, I raced into the barn to let the chickens and duck out for their daily romp.  And then I let out a gasp because I was met by this:

Actually, the snake was curled up in front of the coop door when I walked into the barn.  But I truly did gasp aloud.  Yikes-o-matic!  What to do now?

First I spoke to it.  I said "Snakey, could you move over so I can let the birds out?"  Then the snake curled itself up tighter.  When I moved a bit closer, it struck out at me!  Yikes-o-matic again!

I retrieved a snow shovel and attempted to encourage Snakey to run away.  I felt a bit safer behind the wide blue shovel end of this implement.  And good thing, too, because Snakey hissed and struck out at me again.

The forecast was 85 degrees today.  I did not want the birds to be stuck in the barn all day, but I sure as sh#t was not walking past that snake!  Not when it was clearly unhappy with me!

 So I spoke to it again.  I said "Snakey, you are welcome to all the barn mice you would like.  In fact, I encourage you to hang around and have a feast.  However I must admit that you make me seriously uncomfortable, and so I respectfully request that you move your snake ass over so I can get in the coop and let the chickens out.  What do you say?"

Snakey thought it over.  I moved in a bit with the snow shovel, approaching his personal space.  A very effective method of dog training, put pressure on the personal space until you get what you want, then back off.  And guess what?

Snakey ran off!  "Yes!" I exclaimed!

And the chickens and duck were able to run out and enjoy the sunshine and fresh air.

The end.

PS, I truly would welcome the snake to hang around if it eats rodents, because there are plenty of those in the barn.  You might remember a couple of years ago I was greeted by a snake in the zinnias.  That snake eventually met its maker under the lawn mower.  I cried when that happened -- felt terrible to have killed it.  And figured I'd eliminated a very valuable pest-eater, too.  And my sister reminded me of the snake-toad incident just this spring!  I don't think of toads as pests, so I was unhappy with that snake then.  Was it the same guy?!

But snakes do creep me out, and I'd rather it not show its slithery face to me!  Is that so much to ask?